Two years have rolled by so
quickly, and there is not a day that I don’t think about you.
I’ve lost count of how many
times I’ve day ‘Nev
When Charlie’s been doing some
work on the farm, whether it’s building garden beds for me, or renovating the
cattle yards, or fixing the water pump, or doing some fencing… whatever. I know Nev
The only time I’ve ever seen my
husband lose his composure, was at Nev Nev
I think at that point, I realised
just how much Charlie loved my father.
However, in saying that;
everyone loved Nev.
He was a simple bloke that
wanted for nothing. He had everything he
needed. He had a loving wife and a feral
child (me) that he had seen grow into what I would like to think; a decent
human being. He saw her marry and start
a life of her own with a good man, which made him happy.
He loved his son-in-law. He loved spending time with him and just
doing boy stuff together, like building my bbq, burning tree stumps and reeds
on the farm, hanging out at Bunning’s and just doing boy stuff in general.
When he became sick, that’s the
thing he said he would miss the most. He
was angry that he was being robbed of time with Charlie, and wished he had
spent more with him.
He was thankful for everything
he had, and never complained about what he didn’t have. Sure, he wasn’t a millionaire; he was just an
ordinary, middle class bloke. He wanted
for nothing though. He wasn’t a
materialistic person; that stuff didn’t interest him. No; he was more into quality time with his
family and friends.
When Mum decided to sell Stone
Manor, the biggest obstacle we faced was Dad’s garage. His ‘man cave’. What are we going to do with all of this
stuff?
Nev had said to Charlie ‘this
stuff will all be yours one day, son’, which Charlie struggled with for a long
time. He felt guilty taking it anything,
until Iris pointed out that it was what Nev wanted.
So Charlie took some things,
and we asked Mark (Dad’s unofficial son) to come and help himself as well. Mark’s love for Nev Nev
He would have loved to see his
stuff go to people that would use and appreciate it as much as he did.
Charlie makes me laugh. As I walk into our shed at home, I see that
it’s nearly set up the same as Nev’s was.
This is pure coincidence, but I smile as I see some familiar things. Charlie fusses over these items like they’re precious
treasures. Socket sets (apparently, you
can never have too many), drawer sets for screws and nails, a lathe, and various
other tools that I don’t know the name of, let along what they’re used
for. He has really made an effort to
look after these things, because he appreciates where they’ve come from.
He always saying ‘this is
Nev’s’ when he uses something, like Dad’s car jack (which he used to fix the
tyre on the buggy). He says it proudly,
really, like he wants us to know that he’s using Nev
Dad would be happy.
I think those are the things
that I miss the most. The little, constant
reminders of him. You find your
thoughts drifting away, and thinking ‘Dad would have loved this… Dad would have been so proud…’
He was terribly proud of
Charlie. Would bring his friends up here
to the farm, drag them all over it to show them all the things Charlie had
done. Hello! You have a daughter too, you know!! *laughs *
The last time Dad came here,
was two months before he passed.
Possibly the last time he was ‘well’, if that makes sense.
He became ill not long after we
finished the renovations, and he hadn’t seen them. I kept asking him to come up for a drive and
have a look at it, because I seriously thought he would pass before he got to
see it.
The day he came up, Charlie walked
with Dad, guiding his walking frame around the house paddock to show him all of
the gardens and things he’d done and built since his last visit. He drove him around the property to show him
other things, including the cattle yards.
I showed him around the house and he couldn’t believe all of the
changes. Of course that was nothing
compared to spending time with Charlie.
He loved Charlie.
It was a great day, and a day I
will never forget.
Now, as I sit on the verandah
at night enjoying a nicely chilled bevvie, I look over at the garden we have
built for Nev. I look at the two towers
Charlie built in the middle, that have roses climbing and spilling out of them,
looking spectacular. The rest of the
large garden has some forty-five roses in it, and they’re all in bloom. There is a bench seat that Charlie built
sitting next to it, so we can spend time down there, enjoying the fragrance and
the memories.
In the middle, is a plaque that
simply shares that Nev is finally sleeping peacefully, for that’s where we
scattered his ashes.
Underneath the plaque, is a box
filled with letters, photos, rocky road, freddo frogs and memories. All from his family and friends. A time capsule of memories that will never be
opened. They’re for him to enjoy.
It's funny how time moves on. It stops for no man, as they say. When you lose someone precious, you do feel as if part of your world has ended, but somehow, that world pulls you back, and you move on.
There is a story that tells of
people experiencing three deaths. The
first death, is when your body fails, and your life ends. The second death, is when people stop
visiting your resting place. And the
third death, is when people stop saying your name.
We will never stop saying your
name, Nev
Rest in peace, my friend.
You are sorely missed, and
truly loved.
